Things Guys Want Girls To Know
by womynrule
Summary: Davis is a perfect example of the male species, insensitive, clueless and down right annoying. So when his girlfriend Kari can't understand him Davis makes a list of Things Guys want Girls to Know. And in turns out to be useful! DAIKARI R&R please!


**Inspired by my brother and his great super great advice (smirk) this is a list of things you girls with boyfriends or just guy friends should know, take my advice. It's from the guy next to me. So here we go. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own digimon**

"So…Davis what did you want to show me?" Kari and Davis sat together on the bench in the park. They were together ever since Davis finally got the courage to ask her out for real this time.

But for the past few weeks their relationship was on a rocky start, since they were both so different. "Well yesterday you said you didn't understand guys so I though I'd make a list to help you…" "Ok…" "Read it it might be educational…" Kari took the booklet made from scratch paper and opened a long list and read the first line

…..

40. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out.

39. Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are airbrushed makes you look jealous and petty and it's certainly not going to deter us from reading the magazine.

38. Consider Golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like you do.

37. Women wearing Wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.

36. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.

35. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

34. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done - not both.

33. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?

32. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.

31. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

30. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.

29. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together.

28. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.

27. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.

26. Check your oil.

25. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.

24. Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.

23. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

22. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.

21. Most guys own two or three pairs of shoes - What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

20. Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.

19. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.

18. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.

17. Your brother is an idiot, you ex-boyfriend is an idiot and your Dad probably is too.

16. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.

15. You have too many shoes.

14. You have enough clothes.

13. Anything you wear is fine. Really.

12. Shopping is not a sport.

11. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

10. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.

9. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like every other cat.

8. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.

7. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.

6. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

5. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if he can find the perfect present, again!

4. Don't cut your hair. Ever.

3. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.

2. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

AND FINALLY, THE NUMBER ONE RULE:  
1. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.

…..

"So…do you like it Kari?" "Davis…you're an insensitive jerk that shouldn't deserve anything!" Davis's face fell "But…I can't believe I'm saying this but… I guess I understand guys more now…I realize that guys are way too different from me" "That's right!" "So I'll just back off men for awhile okay?" "WHAT!"

**Hee Hee…well this is just a little fun thing I did with my bro. R&R please for you opinion on the male sex and say if my bro's right. **


End file.
